WASHINGTON, DC -- Deputy Defense Secretary Paul Wolfowitz, one of the key ideological architects of the Iraq war, is apparently showing symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) after narrowly avoiding injury in a rocket attack on his hotel while in Iraq.
    According to insiders, Wolfowitz frequently "takes cover" and loudly reports incoming fire during cabinet meetings. During a recent speech, Wolfowitz spend most of his stage time cowering behind the podium, peering warily out at the crowd while "radioing in" for "air support" using the stage microphone. "But," said a senior administration official under condition of anonymity, "at least now he can plausibly say he's a veteran."