JERUSALEM -- Hailed by State Department officials as "a complete success," the government announced today that Secretary of State Colin Powell has successfully acquired a small but poignant collection of tacky souvenirs from his trip to Israel. US officials denied "playing down" Powell's mission.
    "We never expected anything less than a few 'Wish you were here/Bethlehem' postcards, Dead Sea snowglobes or a few empty cans of Coke with Hebrew writing on them," said State undersecretary Hamill Jones. "We sent a high level envoy to get results in the peace process, and that is what we got."
    The State department reiterated its position in the controversial decision to buy a "coed naked bar mitzvah" T-shirt.